Chibi-Robo vs Ant-Man
Chibi-Robo vs Ant-Man is the eighth battle of the first season of PacmanIsGr8DontH8M8's Death Battles. Interlude Wiz: Heroes come in all shapes and sizes, and these two are proof that no matter how small you are... Boomstick: You can kick some serious ass! Like Chibi-Robo, the tiny toy warrior. Wiz: And Ant-Man, the minuscule moniker of Scott Lang. Boomstick: He's Wiz and I'm Boomstick. Wiz: And it's our job to analyze their weapons, armor and skills to find out who would win a Death Battle. Chibi-Robo Wiz: In the 1960's, a tiny robot would end up becoming the savior of an entire family. His name was Chibi-Robo, and he's accomplished a lot for being just four inches tall. Boomstick: Well, as much as you could expect to accomplish, anyway. Chibi-Robo acted as a housecleaner for the Sanderson family, whose mother was so distraught over how many toys the father was buying that she wanted a divorce. Are we sure this isn't the Boomstick family story? This seems a lot like my life. Wiz: Chibi-Robo decided to clean up the house for the bedridden mother on his quest to find an infinite power source for the largest toy in the house: Giga-Robo. Boomstick: This is the point where you can tell Nintendo was on drugs and all the figures in the room started moving, then they woke up with a game idea. Wiz: On his quest, he defeated an army of robots called Spydorz, utilizing a number of household objects as weapons. Boomstick: He seems to have an infinite storage capacity in his head! He can fit unlimited amounts of garbage, a copter, a blaster, a water gun, and of course... The toothbrush, mug and spoon. Remind me we thought this guy was Death Battle worthy again? Wiz: The blaster is Chibi's most powerful weapon, capable of breaking window glass and destroying any robot that crosses him. The Copter allows him to fly over small gaps, the toothbrush and squirter can... clean any stain, the spoon acts as a shovel and the mug works as a shield against attacks. Boomstick: Chibi is pretty resourceful. The only household item I could use as a weapon is my lamp when that stupid dryer wouldn't give me my socks again. Wiz: Also part of his arsenal is the Chibi-Radar, which can help him find hidden doors, and somehow call aliens from outer space, which shouldn't make any sort of scientific sense. The smallest radar tower that ever reached outer space was one hundred feet tall, yet Chibi-Robo's radar can somehow send out a signal powerful enough to reach outside the Earth's atmosphere while only being four inches in height. Boomstick: Impressive. But my favorite thing Chibi does is when he uses the big honkin' plug coming out of his butt to kill his enemies. It's strong enough to break solid rock... well, pebbles, but again he's bug-sized, and kick a bunch of giant robot ass. And it can be charged up for an electric shock. That's the tiniest weapon I've seen since the time I accidentally saw Wiz's di--''' Wiz: WITH HIS NEW plug weapon, and a reach of up to ten inches... '''Boomstick: Heh heh. Wiz: Chibi was able to successfully do battle with a series of robots who, unlike the Spydorz from the previous game, measure up to at least three times his size. Boomstick: It also works as a fully functional grappling hook! OH! And what about when he becomes a giant fucking Kaiju robot and saves Tokyo from annihilation?! Wiz: This isn't a joke. Chibi-Robo can turn into a gigantic robot and punch a Kaiju to death with as little as eight blows. Unfortunately, this large form of Chibi-Robo requires outside help and will not be used in our battle. Boomstick: OH, COME ON! Wiz: You'll get your Kaiju battle soon, Boomstick. Boomstick: Yeah, but I don't want to have to wait any more to see Mecha--''' Wiz: IN CHIBI-ROBO: Zip-Lash, Chibi retains his cleaning skills, but the plug functions as his primary weapon. It can open doors in a single strike and cling to special surfaces. Unfortunately, Chibi's greatest weakness is his short battery life. He has to recharge frequently or he will die on the spot, and hits from opponents tend to wear it out as well. And some of his gadgets use up extra battery life, such as the Chibi-Copter. '''Boomstick: But sometimes it's worth it to go from being the hero of a little family to the hero of an entire city. Chibi-Robo can do many things, and kicking ass is the best one. Wiz: Brave, intrepid, and protector of mankind, Chibi-Robo is Nintendo's mean, clean fighting machine. "A tiny, independently operating robot that helps keep a household happy. Chibi-Robo stands roughly 4 inches tall. The mere sight of the brave Chibi-Robo working to solve the problems of the Sanderson family is awe inspiring. When he lights up red, it's a sign that his battery is nearly gone. If Chibi- Robo doesn't find an outlet to plug in his cord tail, he'll collapse." Ant-Man Wiz: Born in Coral Gables, Florida, Scott Lang was a hardened criminal who turned to burglary because his job as an electrical engineer didn't provide him with enough excitement. Boomstick: That's what I like to see! Life not fun enough for you? Then do shit! Wiz: After his prison sentence was served, however, he became a family man and even held a career at Stark Industries. But when his daughter Cassie fell ill, Scott decided to turn to stealing again as a last resort. Boomstick: And by pure coincidence, the house he broke into belonged to superhero doctor Hank iym, where he stole the Ant-Man suit and his shrinking gas canisters. Scott: Uh, quick question. Is it too late to change the name? Wiz: But after saving Dr. Erica Sondheim, the only person capable of helping his daughter, Pym let him keep the suit as long as he used it to uphold the law. Hank: Ant-Man was on an undercover mission for the Avengers. That'll explain the bank robberies to the police. Scott: I'm not Ant-Man. Hank: You are now. Boomstick: Not only is he a little hero, he's also a technicians expert. He helped Iron Man get out of his suit following a system overload, and was even hired by the Fantastic Four as their technical consultant. But enough about that, let's get to the powers and fighting! Like when he took down Taskmaster three times, with the Avengers, Spider-Man, and then Hawkeye. You know, Taskmaster? The guy who can predict any opponent's moves? Wiz: However, these occurrences were mostly by Taskmaster's miscalculation, as he thought the canisters still belonged to Hank Pym. Ant-Man was able to grow an ant to assist them in doing battle. Boomstick: It looks like Ant-Man really bugs Taskmaster. Eh? Eh? Wiz: Ugh. While most of his enemies are bug-like in nature, Ant-Man has battled against Dire Wraiths, the Absorbing Man, who can duplicate absolutely any form of matter, and Titania, whose strength rivals that of the Hulk's. Boomstick: With an array of powers like his, it can't be that tough. Ant-Man can shrink himself with the Pym particles in his belt, and his helmet lets him communicate with insects. While useless at first glance, Lang can even grow these insects to a great size with the aforementioned belt. Wiz: And in the Ant-Man film, Ant-Man was able to shrink to a sub-atomic size and sabotage Yellowjacket's suit, causing it to shrink uncontrollably and crush Dr. Cross. Boomstick: A small man with a big heart, Scott Lang has helped a multitude of superhero teams, including the Avengers, the Fantastic Four, the X-Men, and the Defenders after his daughter Cassie was killed by Doctor Doom. Wiz: While this loss filled Lang with grief, it motivated him to never turn to a life of crime again. And to be on the same team with Silver Surfer, and Iron Fist, the world's greatest martial artist, has to be an indicator of his superhero success. Boomstick: And after his daughter was revived by a now heroic Doctor Doom... Wiz: Yeah, if BlazBlue was confusing for you, the AXIS storyline is much worse, and much longer, so we won't go in depth here. Boomstick: ... He shrunk down so small that he could infiltrate Cassie's blood vessels, attack the white blood cells in her body and allow her heart to accept new tissue. Wiz: ... showing the ability to control the size that he shrinks down to, be it smaller than an atom or the size of... well, an ant. The only motivator for Scott seemed to be his daughter, but whether it was her death, her revival or putting her constant danger, Scott distanced himself from Cassie so she could live a normal life. Boomstick: Well, the good thing is that getting away from his daughter didn't stop him from kicking villainous ass. You'd better not mess with Ant-Man, or he'll torture you in the worst ways possible. Scott: My days of breaking into places and stealing shit are over! What do you need me to do? Hank: I want you to break into a place and steal some shit. '' ''Scott: ... makes sense. Pre-Battle Wiz: All right, the combatants are set. Let's end this debate once and for all. Boomstick: It's time for a Death Battle! Death Battle (It's a calm Christmas night in the Lang household. Scott and Cassie Lang are opening presents underneath the tree. Scott hands Cassie the last gift.) Scott: Open it, Cassie. (Cassie opens the box to find a miniscule robot toy. She is unsure of what it is.) Cassie: What is this, Daddy? Scott: It's called a Chibi-Robo! It will clean your room for you! Cassie: Cool! (Time skips to later that night. Cassie is tucked into bed, ready to sleep. Suddenly, the Chibi-Robo emerges from its box. The robot leaves the room to clean the house. He is sweeping a shelf in the living room with his toothbrush when he accidentally knocks over a vase.) Scott: Who's there? (Thinking an intruder has entered the home, Scott dons the Ant-Man suit and shrinks down to investigate. He enters the living room to find nobody inside.) Scott: Doesn't look like anybody's here. (Suddenly, Chibi-Robo appears from behind with the Chibi-Blaster. He shoots the belt off of Ant-Man's waist. It slides across the floor and enters an air vent, falling below.) Scott: It's you! (Chibi-Robo pulls out his toothbrush again and smacks Scott into the wall with it.) Scott: Shit! I can't grow or shrink! Guess I gotta take this robot head-on. FIGHT! (Scott uses his helmet to call several ants from a nearby mound. They begin to march into the house as Chibi-Robo lands the first blow with his robot plug. He continues to hit Scott against the wall until the ants enter through the door. Chibi turns to see the swarm enter the door. He repels them all with his plug, but Ant-Man appears from behind and suplexes Chibi-Robo headfirst into the ground.) Scott: Funny thing about ants is, they can lift fifty times their weight. You won't be a challenge. (Scott prepares to punch Chibi, but he pulls out his mug and blocks the hit. Ant-Man charges up a punch that breaks hole through the mug, but Chibi-Robo pushes it over, trapping Ant-Man inside.) Scott: You can't contain the Ant-Man! (Scott lifts up the mug and throws it aside to see Chibi-Robo knock over a bowl of mints on the shelf above. The bowl and mints fall as Scott scrambles to avoid them.) Scott: Is that the best you got? (Scott turns around to see the Chibi-Blaster pointed directly at his face.) Scott: Well, shit. I guess not. (Scott ducks as soon as Chibi-Robo fires off the shot and punches him in his core. Chibi-Robo falls over and slides across the floor.) Scott: I just wonder what I'm gonna tell my daughter when she asks why her toy broke. (Chibi-Robo runs forward and uses his plug as a grappling hook, swinging and kicking Scott in the face.) Scott: You're tougher than you look. I gotta get my belt. (Scott begins to run over to the air duct, but Chibi-Robo uses the spoon to trip him up. Chibi uses the Chibi-Copter to fly over and guard the grate. Scott charges, but Chibi-Robo accesses his water gun and sprays the floor, causing Ant-Mant to slip. Chibi then walks over and bashes him with the plug, and prepares his Chibi-Blaster for a final charged shot.) Scott: Not so fast! (Scott sweeps Chibi-Robo's leg, causing the shot to go awry, blowing the nail off the grate.) Scott: Thanks for making this easier for me. (Scott goes to investigate the duct to find it is full of trash, and sees the robot emptying its head on the other side.) Scott: Now I'll never find that belt! (Chibi-Robo reaches across the grate with his plug to hit Scott away once more.) Scott: I've had enough of this. (Scott uses his helmet to contact a swarm of ants from the neighboring mound. Chibi-Robo can't hold them off fast enough, and they rip out his arms, legs and plug from his torso.) Scott: (while digging through the garbage pile) ''Ah-ha! There's my belt! ''(Scott walks over to find Chibi-Robo in a pile of limbs.) Scott: Looks like you've got a BIG problem. (Scott uses the Pym particles to grow one of the ants. It steps on Chibi-Robo, separating the head from his body.) Scott: Merry Christmas, bitch. (Cassie enters the living room to see the chaos.) Cassie: AAH! There's ants everywhere! My toy is broken! Dad, what happened? Scott: I'll explain everything, honey. Just get me to Dr. Pym's lab. Daddy needs a new belt! K.O.! Post-Battle Boomstick: That was a big battle with tiny combatants! Wiz: Chibi-Robo may have held the arsenal advantage, but Ant-Man had him out-classed. His training with the likes of the Avengers and his power to call forward insects of any kind made him too much of a match for the poor tin toy. Boomstick: Even without his belt, he could hold Chibi-Robo at bay until he found a way to end the fight for good. Don't forget that Ant-Man was able to defeat Taskmaster on separate occasions even though he could predict his moves. Ant-Man had the capacity to outmaneuver Chibi, and it showed. Looks like this battle was a stomp. Wiz: The winner is Ant-Man. Boomstick: Merry Christmas! Next Time on Death Battle (A misty swamp. Suddenly, a ghastly figure of a deceased woman appears.) ???: You think I'm pretty? (A female ninja appears from the trees.) ???: You won't be after I've eaten your flesh. HISAKO VS MILEENACategory:PacmanIsGr8DontH8M8 Category:What-If? Death Battles Category:Completed What-If? Death Battles Category:What-If? Death Battles completed in 2015 Category:Human vs Robot themed DEATH BATTLEs